Anniversary Celebration Recap {A Link Up}

I am linking up with Wifessionals for one last week to share in the First Year and Beyond series.  

{If you missed the last week's click here.}

This week's topic is an Anniversary Celebration Recap. 

Matt and I celebrated our first anniversary on November 26, 2011. 

{We are only 5 months away from our third anniversary!}

I blogged about our first anniversary in 2011, so if you want to skip you can go ahead and click here. 

But if you are patient, I shall recap right now. 

We had been living in Laie on the North Shore of Oahu for the past year and wanted to get out of our little town for our special day. We couldn't afford to go to a different island, so we opted for a mini-cation to Waikiki. 

We stayed here: 

{The Mona Surfrider} 

Where they gave us leis as we checked in. 

We hung out at the beach and looked at Diamond Head.

{Where we saw some awesome beach-goers.} 

We spent some time at the pool. 

{Where it got a little cold and rainy.} 

We had drinks by the pool. 

{Where we talked about our first year of marriage.} 

We went out to eat at our all time favorite restaurant: Roy's. 

{Where we stuffed our faces with delicious food.} 

We went back to the hotel and got in the comfy robes the hotel provided. 

{Where we took funny pictures.}

We toasted with Martinelli's.  

{Where we drank the whole bottle with no shame.} 

We had a great night! It was such a blessing to be able to have had a mini-cation in Waikiki. Matt and I figured we only get 1 one-year anniversary and we better celebrate with a bang. 

The next morning Matt and I ate at the hotel breakfast buffet, which was awesome, and treated ourselves to a couple's massage. It was a perfect end to our first year anniversary. 

And that's the recap of our one year anniversary. If you are curious about what we did on our second click here, and if you are wondering what we are going to do for our third... stay tuned! 

I am going to miss this series. I have enjoyed looking back on our first year and remembering all the great memories. Many thanks to Wifessionals and all the many other great bloggers for making this possible.

The Boy Behind This Blog

Today I am linking up with Never the Same Spice Twice  and turning over my blog to Matt for him to share his thoughts about my blogging. Obviously,  I am the one that writes this blog, but Matt is always in the background helping me. I hardly ever write a post without talking to Matt about it. 

So without further adieu here is the man behind my blog: 

1. Does your wife use your real name or a nickname on her blog?

She mostly uses my real name.

2. If you had a blog, what would the title be?

I have a blog...well I started one...months ago. Its Called The Octopus Society, because of my love(or obsession) for our eight tentacled friends. It's unkempt and slightly embarassing compared to my wife's. 

3. Do you ever feel ignored by her because of the blog?

Haha no, infact whilst I have been in Korea and she is not I have come to appreciate it much more than I ever did when we were living together. I think it's something, that has in its own way brought us closer together.

4. How has her blog changed or evolved throughout your relationship?

I think its more interesting, and its very easy to see how much her writing has improved over the years. I personally have seen her become more invested in it and really become a member of the blogosphere.

5. What is your favorite post on her blog?

Hmm that's hard to say, I always enjoy her friday flashback posts; but, I think at the end of the day its the little posts about her day to day activities and endeavors that I find to be the most endearing. But if I had to pick, I would say her Elf on the Shelf series. This is when I became more invested in the blog because I helped with the pictures and the set ups. 

I hope you enjoyed this quick look at the man behind my blog! 

Unexpected Moments and Growing As a Couple: A Link Up

I am linking up again with Wifessionals to share more moments from the first year. 

If you missed last week's, click here. 

Today's topic is: What have you learned from the unexpected and How have you grown as a couple during the first year? 

When Matt and I got married we knew we were moving to Hawaii for me to finish school. Our plan was for me to finish all my undergrad courses in a year and then to move back home to student teach and for Matt to start school again. 

But that did not happen. Even though BYU H promised me I could student teach back in Georgia... That was the first unexpected moment in our marriage (and the only one I will share in this post). When we got married Matt was sure he did not want to go back to a church school, and I was okay with that. But I wanted him back in school within a year. 

We quickly had to come up with a new plan and it actually turned out really well. Matt applied to BYU H and got into the Social Work program. What I learned from this little road bump was that if you have faith and are actively seeking a new path, something will turn up. When we were engaged going back to a church school was never going to happen. And through this bump, Matt found a program that is perfect for him. 

All of this led to us becoming closer as a couple. I mentioned this a bit in the last post, but I had a hard time letting go of my mother's advice during the first little bit. (Note: I still ask for her advice, but I always talk to Matt first.) 

I really think being 4000+ miles away from our home was enough to really bring us together. We were newly weds living so far away from those that we had previously leaned on. It was this action that really made us a married couple. We were dependent on each other for meals, money management, employment, and so much more. 

Thinking back on our first year, I have realized that it was the hard moments that really brought us together. It was the stressful times of eating Ramen on the bed in our "studio" apartment that brought us together. Without the hard times and the tests that come with them, we might not have the marriage we have today. 

Matt and I have been married about two and a half years now, and I honestly can't tell you when I've been happier. Matt is my best friend, and I know that through thick and thin he is with me for eternity!

Hardest Moments From the First Year: A Link Up

I am doing another link up with Wifessionals for the segment From One Year to Beyond. If you missed last week's link up post, click HERE. 

The topic this week is: Hardest Moments From the First Year. 

{Us at our 6th month mark.} 

I don't like to look at things through Rose colored glasses, but I think overall our first year of marriage was pretty great. 

That being said, I know there were some challenges and I know there were some major adjustments. 

Here are a few of our hardest moments. 

After being married for a little over a month, Matt and I packed our bags and moved over 4000 miles away to Hawaii. I had a little over a year left in my undergrad program and we decided it would be best to move back to Hawaii for me to finish school. 

Now what you need to know is Hawaii is freaking expensive. I had lived in Hawaii as a single person and it was expensive, but I never really noticed how bad it was until I got married. 

It was very hard to live in Hawaii as students because we were literally living paycheck to paycheck and using all the financial aid we could get. For the first 6 months, Matt and I had to live off campus and we were paying $990 for a bedroom... literally a bedroom. 

It was HARD.  And it was frustrating. There's a saying like if you don't have money you can't fight over money. But I think this is really wrong. If you don't have money and you don't know how rent is going to be paid... or how you can afford groceries... uh yeah things are going to be stressful. 

Now I don't want to stress you out, Matt and I were fine. But it was hard. Everyone was telling us how awesome it was we got to live in Hawaii, meanwhile, I am taking 20 credits and working and Matt is working 50+ hours a week. We didn't have time for the beach!

Another thing that was hard was realizing that Matt and I were now dependent on each other. I think both of us were pretty independent and having to learn how to  rely on each other was difficult. I also needed to learn how to go to Matt first before talking to my mother. For the first couple of months, I would call my mom for advice and then talk to Matt! That is NOT the way to do things in a marriage!

I don't want to go all Kelly Clarkson on you but for real 'What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.' Matt and I have lived far away from family for all of our married relationship, and this distance and the hardships of Hawaii have really made us extremely closer as a couple.

Make sure to go over to Wifessionals and check out the other stories! 

Funny Moments from the First Year: A Link Up

Wifessionals is joining with 10 other bloggers for the month of June to blog about married life. 

I wanted to link up with them and the first topic is Funny Moments from the First Year. 

I thought this would be a fun way to look back at our first year of marriage. I can't believe it's already been 2 1/2 years! 

{Picture from our wedding day 11-26-10} 

Honestly, my favorite funny moment was when I 'made' Matt eat in the bathroom. I know I shared it in my Friday Flashback #5, but I wanted to reprint it for this post. 

So here it is: 

A little over a two and half years ago, Matt and I moved to Hawaii to finish school. Our first apartment was not really an apartment but a bedroom. It was such a horrible place, but we were desperate for anything until we could get into TVA (the on campus married housing- it is about $600 cheaper than other married housing). For a reminder of our first home click here.

As you can tell our kitchen was right next to our bed, so when Matt would get ready for work (at 5:00 am) I could also hear him get ready and eat breakfast. Well, as most of you know or have experienced I get a little crabby, no VERY crabby, if I am woken up. However, I never really remember this crabbiness when I wake up.

Anyway, one thing that I hated about our first 'home' was that we always ALWAYS got ants. We would just think about making food and the ants would come out to play. So one morning I was getting ready in our bathroom and I noticed all these ants running around our shower and floor! I was so confused what was bringing them there since there was no food in our bathroom. So I just assumed maybe it was the sweet smell of my shampoo or body wash. I just ignored them, but day after day they remained!

Then one day I looked in the bathroom trash... and there was a granola bar wrapper in the BATHROOM trash!!!! What the heck? That was what was bringing the ants into the bathroom, but why was the granola bar wrapper in the bathroom? So I asked Matt why he would throw the granola bar wrapper in the bathroom trash, not the kitchen. Which lead to his story:

He had been eating his breakfast at our kitchen table (which was at the foot of our bed) and apparently his noise (the noise of him opening a granola bar) was bothering me enough that I had yelled at him time and time again. So being the nice husband he is and not liking being yelled at by his rude crabby wife he started eating his breakfast in the bathroom!

IN THE BATHROOM- He would put the toilet seat down and sit on top of the cover and eat his breakfast! When I heard this I was so overcome with guilt! What type of wife was I that had lead him to eat in the bathroom (gross)? A tired one? A selfish one? I don't know, but I felt bad!

Now, I can't say I have changed too much with not being the happiest about being woken up, but Matt no longer eats in the bathroom. Although, I am now the one that wakes up early- Matt is so nice he wakes up and makes my breakfast and lunch AND walks me to the car! If I have not said it before, I am saying it now- I am one LUCKY lady. I think at times our marriage is a little one sided. Now I think all marriages go through this at times, but Matt has never made me eat my breakfast in the bathroom and for that I think I will always be a bit guilty.

For those that are reading this for a second time, I hope you enjoyed it just as much. And for those that just now read for the first time, please don't judge me too much! 

Who's In-Charge Here?

It has not even been a week, and I am already missing what it's like to have a husband. With Matt gone, I am realizing all the things he did around the house and in our relationship. 

In the last couple of years, I started to consider myself as the "face" of this marriage. You know, I send the update e-mails out, I blog about our updates, get the doctor appointments, order Christmas cards, pay the bills, keep us organized, etc. etc. etc! 

That paragraph was not to make myself feel really important, but just to clarify my role. 

 I am not any more important than Matt in our relationship, but I'll be honest, I thought I was the one that made sure our life was in working order! 

This is NOT THE CASE! 

Here's what Matt has been doing behind the scenes: 

Taking out the trash and recycling 

Making sure we have stuff for dinner (if I had my way we would just eat sandwiches) 

Laundry (I might just buy new clothes) 

Shutting and locking our front door, which is just a sliding glass door (So, I might have left the door open one night.... oops.)

Making sure I take my medicine 

Putting gas in the car 

Getting my lunch and breakfast ready 

Cleaning the dishes 

And much much more. 

Basically, Matt is the major player in our relationship. Hmmm- who would have thought. 

I sure do miss this guy

In other news, Matt is loving Korea. I can't wait to get there and see everything and teach the kids! 

Working on Us: Part II

A couple of months ago, I wrote this post called Working on Us. It was all about how Matt and I are working together to keep us well, together! 

What we sometimes forget is that we are never safe. I don't want to sound crazy, but I believe it's when you think things are great you start to get a little lazy. And when you get lazy things start to slip. This is true with every part of your life, so we have to be vigilant. 

We have to remember, "Whatever the quality of your marriage now, it can always be better." (The Five Love Languages)

Our marriage is pretty great, but Matt and I have the potential to be in an AWESOME marriage. 

One thing that I feel is holding us back is my patience, or lack there of. I have the worst patience level ever and it's not just in my marriage, but with everything in my life, especially with teaching. 

I get really frustrated really fast when things aren't being done the way I want and when I want. This is equally frustrating when I have a husband who doesn't have the same level of urgency. 

I recently came across a blog (I can't remember which) and the writer chooses one word to focus on for the year. Just ONE word. She tries to improve in this one area and she keeps track of her progress throughout the year. 

I thought this was a great idea and a great way to work on our marriage and to even carry this out in other aspects of my life. 

So my word is of course: Patience. 

{image via} 

I want to work on not snapping at Matt when he is five minutes late picking me up, or when my students ask me the same question I just answered. 

So here it goes. 

Love, 

Alex 

Working on Us

I have wanted to write this post for a while, but I kept putting it off because it is such an important topic  that I didn't want to mess it up. And then I realized, as with all my posts, nothing is perfect. It is more important for me to speak what's on my mind than be afraid to write it because it won't be perfect. 

Matt and I are constantly working on our marriage. Every single day we put in the effort to make sure our marriage stays alive.

"Marriage does not guarantee you are going to be together forever, it's only paper. It takes love, respect, trust, understanding, friendship, and faith in your relationship to make it last."- Unknown 

To do this, I often find inspiration through outside sources. I read blogs, I read books, I look at quotes on Pinterest, I listen to my parents, my church leaders, and pretty much anything and everything to help us with our relationship. 

{image via}

I want to share a secret with you- I am terrified of getting divorced. I know most people don't walk into a marriage thinking yeah I love this guy, but eh it would be okay if it didn't work out. 

But I feel like I am paranoid that one day I am going to wake up and think what the heck have I done and then just run away. 

Now that might be my slight anxiety talking, but it is a major concern in my life and because of it I chose to live hyper-viligant with my relationship with Matt. And I think that is okay. 

We work at this relationship every single day. And some days it is not pretty, and some it's the best thing ever. That is part of the work. Finding things for us that work. This is the purpose of the post- Helping others find something that works. 

So I wanted to share some of my inspiration on keeping my marriage alive and well. I am no expert; heck, I still consider Matt and I newlyweds, but I think any bit of advice can't hurt those feeling like they need a bit of something. 

Today I wanted to talk specifically about finding inspiration. I love finding things that make me want to be a better person, and the things I list below do exactly that!

1. Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married by Gary Chapman- Seriously one of the best books I have read when it comes to marriage. It's not too long and it gives great advice. If you are engaged or in a serious relationship, I encourage you to read it, and then of course talk to your loved one about it. 

2. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman- Uh, what can I say- I like Gary. This was not my favorite boot, but I do think it has a great message and has a lot of great points. I would also encourage reading this. {I will talk more in detail about this book at a later date.} 

3. Friday We're In Love- Ummm this blog changed my life. Well, maybe it wasn't that dramatic, but I love reading every post Camille writes. The purpose of Friday We're in Love is to document their Friday Night Dates. They strive to stay out of a 'business' like relationship with each other and really stay in love. And they do this through dating each other. This is something Matt and I are currently working on. We noticed that some days we would be in the same room all day and had barely spoken to each other. This really bothered us and we are trying to 'date' each other more often. 

4. A Blog About Love- written by Mara and Danny. The title says it all. I love Mara and Danny's story. I love their message, and I love their purpose for writing. This blog gives young couples, like Matt and I, and older more experienced couples plenty to think about in our own marriages and love. Every time I read this blog, I am inspired to be a better wife. 

Over the last two years, and through my research I have learned "Keeping love alive in our marriages is serious business."(Colman) This is the foundation of our lives, and we need to treat it as such. 

I am in no ways perfect, but I know that through hard work and constant active love towards Matt, we can get through any hard spot. 

I will try to post every so often about what Matt and I are doing to help our marriage of two years continue to grow. 

Until then, here's something to leave you with: 

{image via}

Love ya, 

Alex 

The Ho Family: Est. 2010

“Marriage resembles a pair of shears, so joined that they cannot be separated, often moving in opposite directions, yet always punishing anyone who comes in between them."
-Sydney Smith

Enjoy the pictures: